forgotten dreams // dark ambient music mix

Mix is available on Spotify, Apple & Deezer. Link here: lnk.to/darkambient

If you listen to it when you're happy, it's peaceful, if you listen to it when you're sad, it hurts...

Listening to this at night makes you feel like you’re in a different world tbh

It’s crazy how music can have 0 words in it but speak volumes to you

To anybody who's reading this, I pray that whatever is hurting you or whatever you are constantly stressing about gets better. May the dark thoughts, the overthinking, and the doubt exit your mind. May clarity replace confusion. May peace and calmness fill your life. 🙏

These songs aren’t happy, they aren’t sad. They don’t make you mad or judgmental. They don’t make you think… they just make you feel… and I appreciate that more than you could possibly imagine

For some reason the first tune took me back to my early childhood, I remember some toys that would have little melodies that were both calming and sad for me and they would make me feel funny as thoughts would come and go, I'd imagine myself in the future taking care of my old parents, if I would be alone and lonely after they passed away. It's a very strange thing that I as an infant could already have the concept of death in my mind, as far back as I remember I always took this concept with a lot of fascination. It didn't take long though for my father to pass, I was twelve at the time and didn't have the opportunity to care for him as I had imagined. Two months ago my grandma passed too, I had the opportunity to stay by her side until the last day, she was bedridden for the past year, so I'm quite satisfied I got to care for her until the end. And one year and 10 days ago, my girlfriend passed away too, we basically grew up together, we were going to marry, move away, have our own family, and expected to live a calm life, to be there for one another until we were old and ready to part for a while. I had other losses too, but amongst all of them those three have been the ones I had the most diverse experiences with grief. For grandma it hurt just at the beginning, a week later the heartache wasn't there anymore, that's because when we learn about death we already expect for our older members of the family to pass away first, and I was getting ready for that day many years ago. The experience itself was very fulfilling too, since I did all I could do for her, I'd say I accomplished my duty to her. For father it hurt a lot, even though, as well as with grandma, we already expect to burry our parents when we learn about death, it happened very soon in my life, it was unexpected, he had a cancer that grew for a very long time, silently, and when exams finally came it was already terminal. His passing was so shocking I only realised I wouldn't see him again when the coffin was getting closed. At that age I'd look at him and see him as my hero, so it's a very strange thing to see a hero fall like this in one month he was well, and in the other he was sleeping in a bed of flowers, eerily silent. At least I got to say goodbye to him, and from there on the pressure of having to grow up soon taking lots of responsibilities I wasn't ready for gave me a crippling depression. For my girlfriend, this was the toughest one, she is the one who always were there for me, who gave me hope for things would get better, and having her by my side allowed me to dream bigger and go after the things I wanted, but we never think someone our age would die so suddenly. Last year her family got sick, contracted covid and she stayed to help them recover, but she would be the last person of her family to get infected and the only one who died. In one week after she tested positive she had 75% of her lungs afflicted, she got admited in a hospital, and in another week she passed away. In the end I couldn't see her, I couldn't talk to her, I couldn't be there for her, I couldn't take care of her. During the first 8 months the heartache was so intense and so crippling I couldn't get out of my bed, I'd wake up with an intense pain in my chest and would go to sleep with it, sometimes I'd even cry in my sleep. During this time I felt like I was slowly dying, that my heart was about to give up and stop anytime. I felt weak, lost a lot of weight, gained a lot of weight, lost any will to keep on living, wanted to kill myself but couldn't commit to it. I just wanted us to be together, besides that nothing really made sense anymore, other things didn't matter. I still don't know where did I pull the strenght to keep on living, but I know she wouldn't want that for me, I also had to take care of my grandma, and maybe having this single purpose saved me. And now I'm here today, still kind off hurting, but I can still go on. I'm about to be 30 this year, and we were together for half of our lives. So, if you're going trough some very hard times in your life, and don't want to live in this world anymore, and you can't go on, things doesn't make sense, and you've completely lost your way; take a deep breath, because when you think you can't take on your struggles anymore know you have still half of your strenght left, hidden somewhere deep inside of you. And it's fine to stop for a while, or reduce the pace to recover. But if you set a goal for yourself and focus on surviving through these hardships only to get there, you will get a hold to that hidden strenght you have, even if you can't get to that goal, but you will have made through the hardest days of your life, and that only helps you shape a better you. Also don't be shy and seek help, a good professional therapist can help you see through the darkest days. I'm gonna go now, to take my medicine and ready myself for another battle, Godspeed, fellow survivors! ;

I cant believe how sad I would have been listening to this a year ago, I’m so grateful I got over whatever I was going through… I can confirm though, my self esteem and happiness are the highest they’ve been in my life, and to the person who took the time to read this, I wish you the same!

Im listening to this while im traveling through the foggy Alps and the feeling is indescribable

For everyone who overthinks! The main problem is you are trying to have everything under control. Sometimes in life you have to let go and let life show you the path. I've seen many people in my career who don't succeed just because they can't get out of their own way.

The moon is shining The night is silent The room is dark My mind is filled My heart is empty My eyes are tired

- listening to this at night makes you feel like you’re in a different world tbh.

Snowfall ❄️💠💎 0:00 Milk cassette 🥀🌙🍁 2:05 This feeling 🐚🍂🫧 5:10 Retire 🌘💤💍 6:39 You not the same 🦋🕸️🕷️ 10:03 November 8 ⏳🐞🗓️ 12:44 Altas 💧🌊🦋 14:49 If its real, then i’ll stay 💤🍁✨ 16:53 Distorted memories 🕷️🥀🧍 20:35 Life’s too short 🌙🐞🐚 22:34 Morning mist 🌫️💤🕸️ 25:18 Sometimes 💍⏳🍂 28:44 Watching the stars ✨🌙🍂 30:10 Lost tape 🪡🗓️⏳ 31:34 The end is the beginning 🍁✨🌻 33:20 Outside 🌿🌾🪐 35:41 Avenoir 🌷🔥☂️ 37:22 Snowfeild ☁️🏔️🍃 42:17 Dystopia 🛸🪨🦪 45:58 Hide away 🍄🌎🪱 47:49 In ur arms 💎⚡️🐞 49:22 I might be dead 💀👁️🫀 50:50 Emptiness 🪨🧍🏔️ 53:20 Shrine 🪱✨🏔️ 55:37 Runaway 🏃🥀🌧️ 58:18

Every night, at 3 am, I lay in bed and listen to music like this. It makes me think about what people probably experience right now around the globe. How many people are happy, how many are in love, and how many cry. I realize that I don't matter. Many years civilization will follow after I will be gone. My existence is not of any influence. Edit: too dumb for proper English

Listening to this the day before my high school graduation. Feels bad man, but I'm glad I'm taking one more step into adulthood and making my parents proud. My mom never finished high school and my dad never made it. I'm going to make me and my family proud.

I might be alone in this but I never feel sad listening to this kind of music, just calm/neutral. It's a nice change!

The fact that we're all being nostalgic of a time we never knew make me believe of past lives

dear future me, if you ever come back here, because you’re feeling sad over the same guy, or just alone, please don’t let this pain take full control. mom needs you, dad loves you, the twins wants you by their side and sis needs you the most here. so please don’t let anyone or anything tear you down. life is a roller coaster, it goes up and down. remember how much your friends loves you and how much they care about, even though they don’t reallu show it. Dear future me, please be happy and don’t stop growing. -2022 me

To YOU reading this, I pray that whatever is bothering and hurting you or whatever you are constantly stressing about gets better. May all the negativity, dark thoughts, the overthinking, and the doubt exit your mind and may clarity replace confusion. May your life be filled with peace, love, compassion, clarity, and companionship

This is very bittersweet. I am at a point in my life where I am not depressed yet not at peace and this feels like the perfect blend of both.