ADHD in Women vs Men (..and why it can be Harder for Women)💡

Diagnosed with ADHD at 28 this year. Always struggled with inattentiveness, impulsiveness and severe rejection sensitivity. I had no symptoms of hyperactivity. Was told as a child that I had dyslexia (I didn't) and that I was overly sensitive. Peers told me I was a spaz because I would become so overwhelmed in social settings that it would lead to manic type behavior (super happy or super depressed). Biggest relief of my life to finally have a diagnosis that makes sense of all the behaviors I've been criticized for my whole life.

As someone with Inattentive ADHD that went undiagnosed until my 30s, I can relate to some of the challenges getting diagnosed that women experience.

Just diagnosed at 36 and a Mum of three kids. It's taken me over a decade of going back and forth to my GP asking why I was struggling so much. At the end of the day, I went to them with results of a self assessment. They didn't even spot it. You have to fight for yourself!

I feel that people generally have little empathy for adults with ADHD. But I've found that most people have zero empathy for women with ADHD. I have epilepsy, inattentive ADHD, dyspraxia, frequent migraines, and pretty significant depression and anxiety. They're all related. Yet, when I say I have epilepsy, people say 'Oh , I'm sorry,' and when I say I have ADHD, I catch them rolling their eyes. For me, my seizures are a nuisance but my ADHD is debilitating. Most of the time I blame my symptoms on epilepsy or dyspraxia to avoid saying the term 'ADHD.'

I suspect I have undiagnised ADHD as a woman and was many times bullied and called not womanly because of my impulsive behaviour, I have almost no friends and single.

In tears. I’ve known I have ADHD. It was almost a joke that I took your test… on EVERY test I score off the charts absolutely having ADHD. But because I’m ‘successful’… people discount my struggles. I own my own business. I’m a portrait artist. I have 4 children and a good marriage. But I don’t fit in. Anywhere. I’m constantly losing things and disorganized. But I’m fun to be around… so no one sees the tears. I laugh a lot at my shortcomings… because that’s easier than being vulnerable about the fact that I don’t complete tasks and I’m disorganized. Until today… when I stumbled on your channel… I’ve always joked about my adhd… but I never thought there was actually help available… I never thought that at 40 years old… there was anything I could do to make my brain’ slow down’ so that I can focus better… be a better mom…wife… friend… I’m binge watching videos now while I’m working on an art project… and although I’m crying… I’m hopeful. For the first time in a long time… that I don’t have to feel like a screw up… forever. Thank you for taking the time to make videos that are informative. You’re impacting a life. And to me… it’s incredibly helpful.

Oh I was a girl with hyperactive inattentive adhd; and my family just thought that it was normal… that a kid (based on their own experiences) must be naughty… so i floated through exams in school, until high school that I was severely depressed, for years, because I couldn’t perform well. I tried getting back up and standing on my feet again. And that was when I developed OCD to control my ADHD. And I was suffocating myself through my English BA, trying to mask my adhd. After I got my BA finally I got diagnosed. And then I started studying for my real passion. I ranked 2nd nationwide in Masters in business management, specializing in marketing. My life turned upside down once I knew what was going on.

I have been diagnosed a year ago at 44 after losing my job, everything else, and basically gave up on life. I cant put it into words. I cant explain how bad it was and still is. Thank you for your channel. I know I'm not alone. I am just struggling to accept the fact that I have been seeing therapists for depression as early as 18. I have done my best but burned out and now I'm treated as the criminal? I am really struggling to accept that. It's a miracle that I am still alive today and I thank God for that. Thank you for this channel. I am sure it will help me.

With the hormones mixed in, our ADHD symptoms are amplified like 10 times! Definitely not fun :)

I battled for YEARS with depression, stress, anxiety, social anxiety, and racing thoughts. I didnt know what was going on or why i couldnt control all the fleeing thoughts in my head, until a psychiatrist told me "Let's get you scheduled for a neurocognitive exam". A month later, she pointed to the results graphed out and said "this is common for people with adhd". I cried in the parking lot. I wish it was discovered sooner, so many things could have been different, but better late than never.

I was diagnosed this year at 30 and recently read a book about ADHD in women. I haven't finished it (of course) but so far most of the chapters circle around one sad thing: no real research exists. That goes for anything from social problems starting in childhood, to puberty, hormones, menopause, over thinking and low self esteem and suicidality. Not just in mainstream, but also in science and healthcare everything seems to be based on that hyperactive young boy still. That really gutted me. The book is "ADHD Girls to Women" by Lotta Borg Skoglund if anyone's interested.

Please make a video on introverts with adhd 🙏

I am a female that wasn't officially diagnosed until I was 47. When I started on the medication, it changed my life for the better. I wish I had taken medication when I was younger. My life would have been so much better then too 😢...

I am so Grateful that I've watched this and for Your Advice‼💯🙏 I was diagnosed with ADHD in January 2020 when I come off my antidepressants of 11 years and I'm 52 and going through the Change😥 so what you said has made so much Sense‼💯 Thank You🙏 and I am unmedicated because it takes two years to see a specialist😥 I'm not going to lie it has been hard at times😥 but I Love Me being with ADHD‼💯🥰 I wouldn't change that‼💯 I am trying to eat all the right food and I am very active‼ ALWAYS Running Around😂 what Really Helps is that I Meditate Morning and Night and sometimes in the Afternoons if I'm not working🥰 I Am So Glad You're on Here🙏 because i have had no one really to talk to about all this because of lock down😥my family don't really understand and I can see half my family have ADHD now I recognise the symptoms‼ best stop now because I will just go on and on😂 and Yes I can Talk for England‼💯😂 if you understand that phrase😂 #UnityMeditationLoveLockDown

I have combined-type, but I'm more inattentive than hyper. My daughter has combined type and is the opposite. They kid can injure herself just trying to sit still in a chair.

I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was six years old. Imagine my 26 year old mother, hearing this in the 90s! “She won’t sit still, she’s so smart but she doesn’t know how to apply it. She is disrupting the class, she won’t take her naps. She gets up and she walks away”! She was furious, perplexed shocked and alarmed that teachers couldn’t handle CHILDREN when they were being, what disruptive, talkative, hyper, excited.. being what.. CHILDREN!? Hey hey hey though.. she was a kid herself , a single mother. After all, this was the 90s guys 😅 we now have all these incredible resources, endless information, reels, forums.. So yeah, It wasn’t something normal to hear. Having your child put on strong medications is very difficult. It is very difficult having to suppress your child’s personality and having to ask what they are feeling, having to force them to eat, seeing them lose so much weight, not sleeping, getting dark circles under their eyes ,feeling frustrated because you feel like your kid isn’t in there anymore 🧠.. Sure, my grades were off the charts, my mom saw a huge change. But it was hard on her because she didn’t know if what she was doing was wrong to do to a child or if it would help me in the long run. She did everything she could, took me to therapists twice a week to monitor what I was feeling, to make sure that she wasn’t creating an unhealthy addiction. She didn’t just want me to see a psychiatrist, she took me to neurologists, she would tell me everyday when I cried for feeling that my brain didn’t work that I wasn’t stupid, that I was smart as hell, like Albert Einstein😂😂 But that I needed to keep it under control, because I needed to learn patience when others were being taught, to slow down, to wait, channel focus even when not stimulated, to listen, even when I knew what was going to come out of everyone’s mouth.. I would get bored, I would walk out of class, I needed to move. Everything felt so slow and boring, and I had this hyper-fixation, this way of zoning in and out when I wanted to no matter the situation. I wanted to move on and do the next thing while running a mile, and having a tea party if I could 😅 I started reading full on books when I was 3 years old, writing poems when I was 5.. this is what my mother would get so frustrated about. But she saw the behavior, the restlessness, my way of dissociation, and clocking out when I felt something didn’t serve a purpose to me. I would stuff my pills in the couch cushions, because they made me feel muted, sick, inexpressive, emotionless, black and white. I didn’t want to play, felt lost, in the dark, confused, irritated, insecure, stupid. I felt even more impatient, impatient with others. I would get so irritated when other kids would talk to me while on my medication because I wanted to learn, not talk. And I didn’t want to explain why I was acting different today. It was so challenging to find the right balance. So, they gave me everything in the book, Ritalin, concerta (which made me hallucinate that was fun 😅) oh and of course adderall, duh. Six years old being told that your brain doesn’t function like everyone else’s, that you have to learn things differently, that your too loud, that it isn’t time to paint, it isn’t time to write a book, it’s not time to put on a play. I always felt like my clock was ticking to a different tune in a different time. I never knew when it was the right time to do anything. I was hesitant, insecure, second guessing my every move. I was so impressionable, I could not make decisions because I felt that mine were wrong. I had to depend on everyone else (in my head) because to me they were smarter after all they didn’t take pills so they mustn’t be broken, they must be right they are smarter! To me they had the right answers, mine we wrong and everything I did felt wrong. It was all so confusing and I felt that who I was wasn’t who I was supposed to be. And god, it makes so much sense as an adult that I have so many self esteem issues, I was brought up on the insecurity of being weird, or too much. Not so great for development because back in the 90s we didn’t have beautiful things like this video to help us feel okay. I am now 29, and only came to terms with this about 2 years ago, I also struggle with mania, depression and of course to top it off our friend anxiety. Of course i have always taken medication but I finally found the right medication when I was about 17, yup. YIKES. I take something that has no generic so imagine that. It’s the only thing that works with my chemical makeup. Thank you, I am so happy to have found your channel. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜

I’m waiting for an official diagnosis, in my 70s. My son just diagnosed at 39. We had no clue, just though we were not coping with life when everyone else could. I have had severe issues all my life, menopause worsened some symptoms, though I’m much less crazy impulsive. Motivation and focus is bad now. I guess with dopamine going down with age anyway, it’s just really bad for me…I know I am constantly looking for a fix. Had to give up sugar altogether or I would have rapidly headed for diabetes. Easier in some ways as I’m retired, live alone, so can do what I like whenever pretty much. But also chaotic, no structure, severe sleep problems, and I really struggle to finish anything if I manage to start it 😕 Don’t have much contact with people, just my dog. I could go back and diagnose my younger self in a heartbeat, right from a toddler. I’m combined, but the hyperactivity was mostly internal, I was trained to be quiet and relatively still. Mid teens I went way off the rails, lord knows how I’ve got to this age. Relationships were a mess. Constant thrill seeking and putting myself in danger, cars, horses, hitchhiking. Hopeless with money, no executive function. It gave me some good stuff too, not all the impulsivity led to bad things, and I got to do things that most people wouldn’t even try to achieve. And I’ve always been creative in many ways, art, music, writing. Learnt lots of amazing things and skills thanks to hyper focus and being an autodidact when in the zone.But it would have been nice to not always have the mental overlay of thinking I was a screw up, to know why I was the way I was. Nothing I did was ever good enough, in my mind. When I started looking into it, when my son was put forward for diagnosis, everything clicked into place. I found a human race I belonged to. Not official yet, but yes…and it does help. I just wish it had come earlier. I’m sad for my younger self. Your videos have been wonderfully helpful. Thank you 😊

I’m 50 and just got diagnosed 6 mos ago...I have the combination type! I’m going to nursing school!

Thank you so much for your help! I've learned a lot from you since your channel showed up. You are right about non-diagnosing of women. I am an older woman (now retired.) I have never been tested but am now positive that I have it. (Many family members have it.) They used to speak of "ADD," and I thought "I have that." In the last few years I realized that I have ADHD. I sometimes I have hyperactivity and certainly have the inattentiveness. Although I was successful in school and work, it was due to workaholism and ability to hyperfocus. Nevertheless, I always felt that there was something wrong with me. I realize now how much I have battled with ADHD all of my life. Thanks again for your great information!

I am 26 and I was diagnosed 3 years ago, just before I started my academic journey, and I have the combined type. Because both my brother and my mom have the hyperactive type, I was always told that I don't have ADHD and that i'm just lazy. When I took Ritalin for the first time, it was like putting on glasses. Now I am struggling to find a different medication because Ritalin is just not enough, especially on the time of my period. the hormones somehow cancel the affect of the medication and so I have a week every month that I can't really study so I have to catch up the week after and it causes me to work extra hard just to be like every other student. I am thankfull for your channel! even though I am in therapy, it is very easy to forget the strenghts of ADHD and seeing your reels and you videos reminds me of that and why I'm fighting for my degree so badly so THANK YOU