Love Languages: A Philosophical Horror

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i truly felt parasocial love for big joel when he spoke my love language and said 'booby booby booby booby booby booby'

The Five Goblin Languages 1. Mischief 2. Trinkets, bugs and worms 3. Nasty 4. Scurrying 5. Being a little guy

i think the best thing to come out of “love languages” is just normalizing the idea that people you love might not receive love or prefer it the way you do or tend to give it.

Love languages are an anime lore way to explain love. You know, "my power is firebending, I'm from the Hidden Leaf Village, my love language is eating ass" kind of thing.

the top five love languages are: 1: Spanish 2: French 3: Portuguese 4: Italian 5: Romanian wait no those are the top five Romance languages

This love language thing sounds less like a method to figuring out your partner's needs, and more like a guide to befriend NPCs in a video game. "Bert the barkeep hears a lot of sad stories, so give him words of affirmation to make him feel better. Jessie works hard on the farm, so she would love an act of service to take some of her chores off her plate."

Disclaimer: I'm only 3 minutes in, so perhaps he'll address it. The way he's holding the mic like a victorian dowager holding a candle who's come down stairs to investigate the mysterious noise that is most certainly her dead husband's ghost come to warn her of impending doom is absolutely everything, and just became my one and only love language.

POV: you’re at a college party getting wrapped into a conversation with an English major trying to tell you what their thesis is about. You understand 40% of it.

I will say having grown up in a conservative Christian environment, that this book is a great way to teach men who were not raised to understand relationships very well that they do need to show love to their wives in more ways than just saying “I love you” sometimes. And why she might be upset if you like don’t go with her to an important funeral or do the dishes sometimes.

Bob: "I don't know if I prefer the heat or the cold." Chapman: "How do you feel about being burned at the stake?" Bob: "I don't like that" Chapman: "Clearly you like it cold."

The first time I heard about the whole “love language” thing was from a girl who was convinced that getting her boyfriend to take the test would fix their relationship. But I was like, probably the best place to start would be to not cheat on him with me?

To be honest, all typologies like Love Languages, Meyers-Briggs, Astrology, etc. are like your tarot comparison: a fun framework for actively spending time with yourself. They're like board games for the psyche almost. They have their sets of rules, moves to be taken, and game mechanics that let you play with your identity. But not to be taken as gospel or as psychological truths which can explain other people and quantify them as predictable phenomena. "My love language is quality time!" i.e. actually sharing your life with and enjoying the company of the person you're with. A good thing to remind yourself of, if you're having troubles with someone, but not much to base your personality around.

I had a pleasure of reading the original edition of the Love languages and the author was very straightforward about his goal being divorce prevention. My absolutely favourite chapter was that on a lady married to a violent drunk, who was told to save her husband and the marriage itself by granting the husband an unlimited access to her body. Because ya know, his love language was physical contact 🙃🙃. Gary followed with detailed descriptions of that woman crying and begging for an alternative, so there was no doubt that he knowingly made her submit herself to yeezus knows how many instances of SA. And guess what, her magical vagina cured her husbands patterns of violence 🙃🙃. Cause there's nothing more powerful than silent self-dehumanization. Apparently once the book started gaining traction, it was methodically sanitized. My guess is: the veird vibes that you're picking have something to do with it.

I had a bf who clung to love languages pretty hard. Unfortunately knowing my "love languages" did nothing to actually address the things I wanted from the relationship

Every time love languages are brought up in conversation, my mind always goes, “I want all of these things. NO WAY YOU’RE MAKING ME PICK ONE”

The way he twists scenarios into his 5 categories definitely reminds me of the conversation people define anything as salad, pizza or a sandwich. Soup is a salad and I am a sandwich. The world is a pizza.

the concept of Sonnet 116 being a transcript of Shakespeare being super weird at a wedding is one of the funniest things ever oh my god

Can't believe he outlined 5 romantic love languages and missed the most important one of all: tummy kisses

I will never understand the cultural obsession with pop psychology when the actual up-to-date stuff is just so much more rich and interesting. It's like being interested in swimming but only ever doggy paddling in the shallow end of the pool.