Final Fantasy VII Remake (dunkview)

"Hi, this is Pizza Hut, how can I help you?" "The mayor."

The biggest disappointment of this game is the lack of robot hand backstory.

Just checked back in on this video at the end of 2021, and it looks like all the haters changed their minds, and removed their dislikes on the video. More proof that dunkey is always right about video games.

This is my favorite negative review of a game/movie/etc that I like because he builds his case really well and throws in some awesome jokes. He gets me to think about stuff I might not have noticed. I love Dunkey's work

Jessie: Literally Dying Cloud: Yeah I'll have a large with extra cheese.

I still don’t understand why Cloud from smash bro’s needed his own game

Holy shit Dunkey really out did himself this time so many people are angry in the comment section about his review yet he doesn't have a single dislike

As someone who didn’t play the original game I went from, “oh this is pretty cool, I like the combat and it has an okay story”, to “WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON!?” once I got to the last 3 hours of the game, and then I sat there confused trying to figure out if this was the first part of the original or the full thing

Jessie: On her last breath, dying Cloud: "The mayor."

The Mayor." "Sorry?" "You owe me a pizza." "Sir, this is Walgreens."

"Camera keeps pulling back. Will Smith Men In Black" Dunkey won youtube because of that

"ANYBODY ORDER A FUCKING PIZZA!?" Jessie didn't

Everyone on Twitter to Dunkey: You owe me a pizza. Dunkey: The Mayor.

Jessie: Dies Cloud: The mayor.

That Hobbit comparison is spot-on. I'm playing the game right now and I couldn't agree more with just about every point in this review. The longer it goes on, the worse the Nomura-isms and anime tropes become. At least the anime mouth sounds aren't anywhere near as prevalent as they were in KH3... I'm on chapter 10 now and my enthusiasm is waning by the minute. Also, maybe it's just me but having every female character either tell Cloud how amazing he is or just outright throw themselves at Cloud non-stop in every single one of their shared scenes just feels like a particularly pathetic attempt at pandering to the player to me. ... sure is pretty though.

Donkey is one of the few youtubers who doesn't get carried away by hype or fanboyism when he reviews a game. We need more dunkeys in our world.

Dunkey you dingus. Obviously she had to carry the baby as slowly as possible in order to meet the requirements of the Strand-type genre.

Honestly, Cloud does seem like the kinda guy who would walk around saying "The mayor" to open a conversation.

The FF7 remake reminds me of Star Wars sequel trilogy or Rebuild of Evangelion. They start out trying to retell the story, and eventually it becomes a meta-commentary about how infinitely profound it is to be a fan of this one thing from decades ago. It's not that they make changes, changes are fine. It's that for every change, there's all this meta self awareness built in about how incredible it is that they changed something, and how infinitely rich the story is as a result. These franchises are collapsing under the weight of their own fandoms, who at this point are the creatives. Good media experiences come from people who have interesting life experiences and imaginations and intellectual histories. If you hand over Star Wars to groups of people whose entire life experience is "being a star wars fan", you get a movie about the meaning of being a star wars fan. That's what FF7 remake feels like.

Those first 50 seconds hold literally the best review I've ever heard. I comeback to this from time to time just to brighten my day