10 TROPES We Hate About Rom Coms

I think the worst romcom trope is the whole “persistence will get you the girl” thing. The main example that comes to mind is the notebook. He keeps asking her out and asking her out, she keeps saying no. Very firm in her answer. Then, only accepts when he threatens to jump off of a Ferris wheel to harm himself. That kind of thing is not romantic, especially in real life.

I once read this text post that basically said: "The way love triangles are often written is kind of bad because it's two people backing someone into a corner, and it's usually a woman." Blew my mind.

I liked that in legally blonde the "makeover scene" was just her giving confidince to everyone by showing a move that increases their confidence, not a makeover.

I had a first hand experience with why rom com tropes are terrible and how they truly do influence people. I was basically Kiera Knightly in Love Actually, except the guy was singing to me. This was also my "love triangle moment". I had to be honest with him. I told him we could be friends but that was it, that the person I was with (who is now my husband) is the one I wanted to spend my life with. For whatever reason, he wasn't convinced that I had no romantic feelings for him. After I rejected him, he showed up at my house with his guitar in hand. I found myself thinking, "what kind of shitty rom com am I stuck in?" I hated it. It was uncomfortable and frustrating. I didn't want to hurt this person, but it also infuriated me that they truly believed that they could show up on my door step and win me over with some big "romantic" gesture, completely disrespecting not just my boyfriend (who by the way was with me when this happened), but also disrespecting me. It was a huge red flag and it led me to break off the friendship. If you are wondering what my spouse (who was my boyfriend at the time) did when this happened: he did nothing. He let me handle it. And if anything this reaffirmed my love for him even more because life is not a rom com. I don't want guys engaging in melee over me. I'm not property, I'm not a trophy. He doesn't need to win me in a pissing contest.

I like how in the original non disney version of The Little Mermaid she goes through the transformation for the prince to still choose another girl. Her sisters response to this is 'kill him'. Seems more legit and true to life.

My least favorite trope: The miscommunication that could have been clarified in 10 seconds, but is now the basis for the near end of movie break-up, because two adult people are not mature enough to have a damn conversation.

I love telling people this story: My parents HATED each other when they first met. They worked at the same college, my dad in the cafeteria and my mum in the registrar, and one of my mum's benifits was that she could have free drinks from the cafeteria, but my dad was new and didnt know this, so when she came in to grab a coke and leave, he said "are you going to pay for that?" and she said, "hmm nope," and then just left. For like 2 months after that, they couldnt stand each other. He thought she was this lawless b*tch, and she thought he was uptight and a jerk. Then my dad was talking to his buddy about a redhead that worked up in the admin office, and the buddy THOUGHT he was talking about my mum, but he wasnt. Anyway, they get set up on a date by the buddy, get there for the movie and dinner, and he is... shocked, to say the least. My mum was like, "why is this prick asking me out? Whatever. Free dinner." And dad was like, "wait, this is the wrong redhead!" Long story short, they ended up going dancing after the dinner and they had a bit of fun, did a few more dates where they started to tolerate each other, and then were married 3 months after the first date. They have been married for almost 30 years now and they get on great, most of the time. They still argue a lot over petty stuff, but they do ultimately enjoy each other's company.

The worst trope: someone who is in love with his/her friend and the friend doesn't realize it until he/she starts dating someone else 🤦🏻‍♀️

8:45 I have been saved FROM a man BY a wolf. My parents had wolves, random guy showed up in the yard and started talking to kid-me. Wolves didn't like how the guy was walking toward me and surrounded me baring their teeth at him. He wisely decided to move on. Lol

I love Princess Bubblegum's take on love at first sight: "“What you're feeling is called infatuation. The pain is the product of you overvaluing a projected, imaginary relationship with me.”"

As a female, neither the love triangle nor the love rhombus appeal to me 😂 When the love triangle happens I start shouting at the screen, "Make up your mind already!" It's always the good guy that gets shafted in the love triangle... I married the "good guy" and can confirm that our life is not vanilla or bland :)

Been doing search and rescue for 7 years now and only once did I ever encounter a wolf and woman at the same time. Not only was this very much not the time to ask her out, (She had just been lost in the woods for 3 days and had a near death experience) but honestly the whole wolf pack wasn't very interested in us other than we were making a lot of noise, and they were trying to sleep.

I've always depised the makeover trope, where an already gorgeous girl is given frumpy clothes, glasses or a ponytail, and nobody realises her "True Beauty" until the big reveal. One of the tropes that "Not Another Teen Movie" brilliantly parodied.

A big romantic gesture for me was when I told my partner, during conversations over the years that we'd been together, that I did not want to be proposed to in public. I did NOT want a big song and dance and I really disliked it when the parents are asked for permission *barf*. One morning about a year ago I woke up to my guy kneeling beside the bed with a ring. When he asked me to marry him I was comfy, cosy and warm in our bed. I said yes, and then I asked him to marry me. He said yes too. He told my family beforehand what he was going to do. It was respectful, a courtesy, but it wasn't seeking permission. It was perfect.

The thing with Grease is, Danny actually did start to do his own transformation and become a more real person for Sandy. He started getting to the point where he no longer wanted to keep putting on this facade for his friends and be more honest with himself and those around him. But then the movie does a 180 on this soon as Sandy changes herself at the end (which if they had just kept going with Danny's change, Sandy's would've been unnecessary and they both would be in a more honest relationship), and they basically just threw all of that development for him out the window.

This whole video is probably why my favorite romantic comedy of all time is My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Coming as a girl with a big crazy family who used to eat ethnic food that made the other girls go 'ewww what is that' (its liver. its delicious. you don't know what you're missing.) and went through an awkward phase as a teenager I could really relate to Tula. She and Ian are just so cute, I love how they seem to genuinely get along and enjoy each other's company and her big thing is like 'omg i love my family but they're so embarrassing' and he is just so down for the whole experience and doesn't just tolerate it half heartedly he throws himself in so completely he's the one leading the dance at the end and he doesn't just win her over, he wins the whole family over. By just being a nice, decent, good person. There's no bad boy backstory, he's just a nice guy who wanted to meet a 'real' girl and Tula isn't the 'not like other girls trope' she's a pretty, funny travel agent who loves her job and her family, wears cute girly clothes and makes him laugh. They're such a great team and I really wish more romantic comedies had couples like them.

"I’ve become skeptical of the unwritten rule that just because a boy and girl appear in the same feature, a romance must ensue. Rather, I want to portray a slightly different relationship, one where the two mutually inspire each other to live - if I’m able to, then perhaps I’ll be closer to portraying a true expression of love." - Hayao Miyazaki. Love is not just an emotion. Love is a promise, a promise help each other, not hurt each other. (Paraphrasing from Doctor Who)

Gotta admit, I've got a soft spot for the "enemies to lovers" story, but only if there's a "platonic friendship" stage in between. Also, it works a lot better in series where you have more time for them to sort out their differences and slowly start to connect.

I had an experience having highly disliked someone that turned into a romantic interest. I started a new job. This guy was assigned to help me with something. He was so horrible and nasty the whole time, and apparently thought I was too bubbly and I got on his nerves. So we severely didn't like each other. Until one evening I was working late at my end of the office and didn't know he was working late in his workspace at the other end of the office, so I had my music up and was singing to the top of my lungs. He comes walking in with a smirk and we just started chatting. Turns out the song I was singing was his literal favorite song and he was drawn to come see who was singing. Then he saw I had a picture of my favorite artist at the time, Garth Brooks, on my screen saver who was one of his favorite artists. Turns out his mom had died just days before I started at the job. So my perky was clashing with his grieving and that's why his attitude was so bad at that time. He was actually a really nice, sweet guy and I liked him a lot. We didn't end up together; but, it felt like a seismic shift at the time. 😊

I was in a love triangle once. I was casually seeing two people who both knew we were not exclusive, but both wanted more. I ended up distancing myself from both of the guys and turning inwards because I had been feeling terribly guilty, the responsibility was just too heavy, even if everybody was informed about the whole situation.