Growing Up.(I'm growing up way too fast).

Published 2021-01-10

Growing up.
I stole my smile for a feeling
Its as real as it gets
I'm too deep now
I know I'll have to start over
But my two feet can barely stand
And every time I get up I feel like sitting down
Life is starting to dawdle before my eyes
I'm not the one navigating
This time I'm in third person all the time
Just watching, slowly
In full perspective,
Eyes barely blinking
Like the miniscule interval before you close your eyes and fall asleep
Dozing off but never actually falling asleep
I wonder if I'm ever really asleep
Cuz every time I dream I feel like I'm everywhere at once
And when I wake it seems like my eyes aren't really open
Soon, the line begins to blur
I’m too aware now
Aware of the situation
Aware of the conundrum
My consciousness is hungry
Even when I seem to be out of breath
The farewells from the past
All our hopes and dreams of the future
All together in the center of gravity
We’re caught up in the mix of it all
There is no written logic for purpose
As we have paved our own path since the dawn of earth
It's the only lifestyle we know
We’re helpless without our ideals
And lost without connection
I’m not friends with time anymore
Time just likes to move ahead
Occasionally time moves ahead of itself
And makes the pursuit of happiness unbearable
As we become unbearable to ourselves
And the real world is only a veil of malaise
Creating a longing for the foggy days of back then
Such is life, such is mortality
I stole my smile for a feeling
And It's as real as it gets

My socials- linktr.ee/hazocean
Song used- • Video (He is so talented go check him out) :)
Background pic- Photo by Klaudia Ekert from Pexels