Derealization | Feeling disconnected (what to do about it!)

Have you ever felt derealization before? 🤭

This happens to me any time existential OCD flares up. One theory I've heard is that when you are especially overwhelmed, your brain sort of numbs itself as a defense mechanism. In the same way that anxiety is your brain trying to protect you against an external threat, derealization is your brain protecting you from overstimulation. That can explain why it happens during intense episodes of anxiety, or after traumatic events. It can also explain why it tends to stick around the more we try to push it away, because we keep feeding the anxiety. So next time it happens, try treating it like that sweater you always get from your aunt every birthday. You know you don't need any more sweaters, but just smile and say "thanks", because it means she cares about you.

Coming back to this video 4 months later to say that I’ve finally recovered! No more DPDR or existential OCD, I get to live my life again! So thankful to have gone through this because thanks to all of it I’m stronger now. Sending love to anyone currently struggling with this. I know firsthand how scary it feels, but you can absolutely go back to how you were before, just live your life holding hands with your fear and give it space to leave naturally. Thanks for reading this, you are strong enough to handle this.

I've struggled with this since I was 10, basically every day for decades. What helps the most for me is just to not fight it, pretend I'm in a video game and keep going through the motions of daily life until it fades into the background again. It's extremely uncomfortable, especially when it hits while driving or having a conversation.. but it's not dangerous. My heart goes out to every one of you struggling with DPDR, too. I thought I was alone in this for so long ❤

Through therapy I've realized that I was dissociated/experiencing DP & DR for my entire childhood. It became chronic after a traumatic event in my twenties; it's been two years and I suffer everyday. There are days when I can cope with it, but most of the time I'm terrified. These comments show that I'm not alone. Hoping for recovery in all of us ❤️

I'm in tears right now watching this in a public library, but it doesn't matter cause my problem for 13 years has finally been answered, I feel this relief & I cannot do much but say thank you Nate.

This video is the most comforting video I’ve seen in my life so far. It’s insane to see how not alone I am, and that my OCD directly relates to this. I never knew what exactly was going on. Everything makes sense now & I feel so much more comfortable. Thankyou

this is actually so helpful as an anxious person. I will constantly be in my head about things during these periods, now I’m just trying to embrace the feeling like “wooo this is so fun I feel like I’m slightly high and everything is in 4k ultra hd”

i often experience this. i first had it when i had an existential intrusive thought. and i panicked. i didn‘t know about my ocd back then, or about derealization/depersonalization. i still have it, along with other ocd themes. everytime i got it, i experienced panic attacks because i wanted to fight this state that made me so anxious. now i just try to accept it as it is, and that it will be going away eventually. i have lived in this state for a few weeks actually (along with constant panic attacks what made the dr/dp worse) and some day, when i finally accepted it and didn’t overthink it, it just went away. i allow it to exist, no matter how bad or horrible it is, knowing it will fade. sometimes i just get so deeply into it that i cannot even talk anymore. i worry so much that people will judge me for it..

This is great. My day goes based off my feeling and checking all day. My emotions control what I do. Some days harder then other. I’m just trying to escape the moment all day. Then later I’m regretting that I didn’t enjoy my self.

I’ve been having derealization/depersonalization for 6 months now. It’s not the first time I’ve had it, when I was 12-15 I had it constantly and could only think about how much I wanted to feel alive again. The recent flare up of 6 months has been excruciating, because it’s the only thing that I can think about. It’s hard to go to school or anywhere else because I’m in constant fear and always feel off balance/like I’m going to pass out. It makes me worried how I will finish school, since I’ve been staying home an awful amount and it’s sad because I’m a straight A student and people expect the world from me. My dad is a psychiatrist and he’s been telling me to face my fears, but we would always just end up in fights when he tried to help me so I finally convinced him to get me a therapist appointment. My first appointment is on Wednesday, it was supposed to be 2 weeks ago but my therapist was sick and it makes me really anxious because on Monday I have to start going to school again (because spring break ends). I really don’t know how to deal with it and I really hope therapy will help me. For the last 6 months I’ve realized that none of my friends or family members are caring enough to listen to my problems and I don’t have anyone to tell how I’m feeling. It feels like I’m going insane because 24/7 I just have philosophical thoughts about what reality even is, if I’m even real, what worth anything has, why I’d even bother to do things if I’m going to die anyway, and so on. They make me extremely anxious and I’ve found myself having to excuse myself to go to the bathroom 2 or 3 times a day just so I could calm down enough to not break down in a full on panic attack in front of people. It’s exhausting and I don’t wish this on anyone, even my worst enemies. This is one of the first YouTube comments I’ve ever written in my life, I just had to get this off of my chest…

Derealization lead to my crippling existential ocd... before that, i was a bit anxious but i was FINE... one panic attack set the whoke thing off because i responded with resistance, reassurance seeking, trying to fix and analyze it... wish i knew a year ago what i know now and i wouldn't have suffered the way i did but im glad i know now! I have good days and i have scary days, but no matter what i remind myself that i am safe, ocd is a liar and Derealization is like a protective helmet my body gives me to try and help me chill out

Coming to acceptance and just going with the flow seems to kinda work for me. I’m like “OK, I’m stuck in some David Lynch film or something…” Acceptance didn’t come easily, tho… Be Strong, Dream On 💪🏽💪🏽💪🏽

This helped me and I felt my heart rush again by accepting and laughing about it. Thank u :)

After smoking weed in high school I developed dpdr, thought I was losing it because I continued to feel high for 2 weeks straight. That was 14 years ago and I’ve struggled anywhere between total detachment and a light daily buzz, the daily buzz I’m used to by now, it’s become my norm. I never really have felt like I’ve ever come back. One thing I’ve learned over years of this is to not panic, anxiety makes it so much worse. And it’s also normal to not feel an attachment to loved ones some days. You know you love them but you just don’t “feel it”. And that’s normal, just comes with the territory. On really bad days I find nostalgia to be the thing that helps the most, for me it’s Disney movies, or talking with an old friend. Stirs up feelings of being a kid again when I didn’t feel like this. For anyone struggling with it just know there are worse ways to live, and overtime it does get better, but you have to cut yourself some slack and stop thinking so much. Living in your head just adds fuel to it, get out and do things.

I've had derealisation in very tired/anxious moments of life. Having an episode today. What usually helps? Exactly what you say. When I fully embrace it and let it wash over me. I accept it and I tell it it's welcome to stay, however long it wants to. And I fully accept that this is what reality feels like for a while. And woosh... Usually goes away a few days later. Ill practise this today, and it will be what it will be, and I love life nonethless, I just cant feel it right this instant. :)

I'm blown away 😳. You put into words what I couldn't understand for the past 10 months...it's like I've just broken out of a frozen/paralyzed state. The accepting part is so true. If I hadn't let this "thing" (now I know it's called derealization) bleed for the past 2 or 3 weeks, I don't think I would've arrived here.. it is so necessary to let go, even it feels like the world is ending for you. But in order for me to let go without harming myself physically, I had to use my fears to stop myself from doing something I would regret. It's like I just had my own TV show and I'm in the final episode where everything is explained and revealed........

It’s like I know people say it’s not that big of a deal because your actually ok and have no physical harm but people that have not gone through it don’t understand how scary it can be. Thank you for taking a different approach to it because lots of professionals I’ve talked to have given me technics to calm panic attacks by counting things and grounding myself but that can be something that triggers it for me. Realizing I’m in existence brings me into a derealization episode. I will definitely try this technique of acceptance rather than trying to solve it the next time I get my derealization

I have both depersonalization and derealization for a couple months now i got it from smoking, and for everyone scared that it wont ever leave, it will i have been getting better!

i tend to question my own existence, for example, “ I don’t exist “ or “nothing is real” , possibly this is derealization or just me going crazy . I will continue to openly greet them (the thoughts), i will agree with them , and i will try my best to be a good person.