Tips to Handle Overbearing In Laws

If your partner does not put you first but defends and prioritizes his family over his partner....then he is a son first and a husband second. You'll always be fighting for respect and feeling alone against bullies. Save your sanity and don't sign up for that hell if your partner is not on your side always. That's a controlled weak grown boy.

Am I the only one who thanks to Covid for giving me a great time away from them 🤣

You don’t let people who are unsuccessful in marriage or live like roommates control your marriage

Don't get involved with someone if their family all lives in a town where you don't have family. Your life will become engulfed by them.

Rule number 1 with dealing with in - laws: Set Boundaries. Follow through with those boundaries. Remember that you are a team. My “monster - in - law” has high anxiety and tries to inject her views in our marriage. She called me controlling and I had to tell my spouse that that is a strategy for her to try and keep that control over you. I had to set boundaries. The more she injects her opinion the more you have to remember that WE are a team and it’s your responsibility to set boundaries. When people get married, the bond they have with there parents should break and YOU become one with your spouse.

I have 3 sons! I’m raising somebody’s father and husband. Once they choose a wife and have kids, they will be his first priority. Never will I expect any of my sons to choose me or their dad before their wives and kids. Once they marry, they are no longer my baby but a man! Quit raising man-babies. Let your kids dictate their lives when they become adults. Of course I’d like to be a part of their lives but within reason and boundaries!!! Meanwhile, I’d rather be traveling the world with my hubby enjoying what little time we have left on earth than worried about what any of my sons are doing with their partners

I ban my in laws from my house and I started to feel better and I'm starting to feel happy. My relationship with my husband is more open and I get equal control now in my household.

does he not know that people are truly out there to hurt you? I fight. game on.

Grown ups really need to build new lives away from their old families. When you marry someone its times to build your own legacies and generations. You can show respect to your family but setting boundaries starts at day 1.

My in-laws did not respect any boundaries, so we pulled back. The gossip made us the bad guys, but we didn’t bend or break. We love from a distance. My hubby deals with his family and I deal with mine.

Christmas this year, I already told my in laws that we are going to florida to visit my family next year. Thank god! Can't stand em.

WE ALL GREW UP AND HAD SUCH A WONDERFUL LIFE BEFORE MEETING OUR IN-LAWS ! YOU CAN STILL HAVE A GOOD LIFE WITHOUT THEIR LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE ! REPEAT THIS TO YOURSELF !!!!

my goodness...good to know i am not ALONE

I don’t understand how he’s saying that you should look at them with love and not be a outsider because they will look at you as competition but then he’s also saying don’t go to Christmas and go on vacation lol that’s absolutely putting yourself in a outsider role.

Ban the MIL from the house.

I've fought my entire life for my freedom, only to have someone come along and try to claim it; all the while trying to hold me hostage by using my own fiance as a human shield. (Sigh)... I need help.

None of these works if your in laws live in your house and your spouse is scared of his own mother and try to avoid her at all cost.

The wife comes before the mother. Husbands need this advice.

I was hopeful that this would help but if your in laws hate you and no matter what you do they won't accept you in their lives then what can you do. And I don't agree you have to love them. People who hate you do not respond to you loving them.

What a load of crap. You cant force love it has to come naturally and mutually. There is no point in changing yourself in order to accomodate others difficult behaviour. Your only inviting more problems into your marraige when they see your love towards them as weakness and submissiveness. That leads to them being more forceful and disrespecting boundaries. Playing the offence is a miserable life always having to counteract your inlaws before they make the first move. Its not dodgeball! To lead a peaceful happy life is to just focus on your spouse and less attention to the unlaws. Go to him for everything that hurts you allow him to sympathize with your feelings.