【單曲推薦】【僕が死のうと思ったのは】【薇爾莉特】

”The reason I can’t stop thinking about death, must be that I take living too seriously.”
This line hit me really hard.

"the reason I wanted to die"
YouTube : recommended to you

I feel like dying, but I don't want to die. I want to escape my life, but I don't want to leave everything behind

i've learned that it's not that i want to die, it's that i want to live. live a different life and escape from the current version of life that i have. and that reinventing yourself, making changes in your life, going to a place you've always wanted to go, doing something you've always wanted to do - signing up for singing classes, trying out to be an actor, entering a language academy to become fluent in japanese so you can work in japan and live like a local - doing reckless things like that, is infinitely better than ending the life you currently have. that's what's so beautiful about life. there are endless possibilities that you can follow. and if you're not happy in one path, go ahead and change your course. take another path. do that over and over again until you find happiness. my philosophy professor used to say: "happiness isn't something you look for. it's something you create."

The truth is, I like to be alone... But I hate being lonely

A little background about this song...
Amazarashi originally wrote and sang the song and gifted it to Nakashima Mika when she was going through a really rough time with her comeback after taking hiatus due to sickness. She had eustachian tube dysfunction which feels almost like when you are on a plane that's descending. The pressure build up in your ears causes all sound to seem very muffled. Her condition was so severe that she could barely hear her own voice while singing and had a really hard time hearing the accompanying music. She was treated in the US but ultimately could not be cured of the condition.
She performed really poorly on her comeback live performances - bad singing volume, off tone, off rhythm. A lot of people and Japanese media bashed her while knowing nothing about her condition and said she just came back for the money and her singing is not good anymore.
She said she cried really hard when she received this song and felt like it represents the voice from her heart. It was really touching to see her perform this live on stage, stomping her foot to the sound of the drums so she can keep the beat since she can't hear the accompanying music that well.
There's a video of her performing this song live. It's not the best version of the song by any means - she goes off tune and her volume is all over the place. But you can truly feel how much passion she has and how she just wants to keep singing.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QL3T2Nzcqcs
Original version by Amazarashi:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BalTlR8kTDw

芝麻翻唱的真的很棒，很動聽
兩年前在廚房工作，早上四點半便要起床，稍做整理便要出門了，那時真的非常不適應，可以說天天都不快樂
在通勤的路上我總會戴著耳機聽著一首首歌，試圖平息心中的不安，尤其聽到這首歌，好幾次都快哭了
最後我還是選擇離職，因為我明白，那不是我所想要的生活。感謝這首歌給我這樣的勇氣。

"If I'm just living like a dead, empty person then what's the point in living"

"You can't change people"
"So what do you do?"
"You love them."

說真的中島美嘉10年患病接近失聲 停止一切演唱活動 併發症導致耳疾 聽力下降 期間冷嘲熱諷說她不努力 驕傲自大 多大的委屈和壓力 這首歌聽到最後淚流不止 堅硬的心一下子就軟了 每次看她這首現場 在跺腳打拍子 去摸音響找拍子 我在拿着手機找紙巾 前半首歌她在唱着她的絕望 後半首歌還在激勵我們 這纔是我們真正的歌姬

當初聽這首歌到時候是國小，那時純粹覺得旋律好聽，現在要升高一的我，完全明白了歌詞，一路上不容易，但從來沒有輕易放棄，努力的做好每件事情。

This has been my comfort song way back 2020 when I was conducting field experiment for my undergrad thesis. It was on set of covid and there's not much people around. I remember crying with this music playing in my earphones, it was past 7pm and I'm still in the field watering my experimental plants. it was dark, i was alone with no one to help and no one in sight. I'm so glad for surviving all that. I've since graduated and planning to pursue graduate studies next year. I get bittersweet feelings whenever i listen to this song. i remembered how alone i felt, how hard it was, but then i get so proud of myself for making it this far. ❤️ This song will always hit home❤️

it's sad when u realize that a random stranger in comment section can understand u more that ur family

"The reason I can't stop thinking about death, must be that I take living too seriously."
This entire song makes my heart hurt...

24 yrs of existence in this world yet I havent heard someone said this words to me "I Love you", " I'm proud of you" and "I appreciate you". Even just once I really wanted to hear it before I die. Lucky are those who heard these words from their parents or from someone. 🖤

この歌が海外にいる僕と同じような方々に届いて、そして伝わっていることが嬉しい
多分みんながそれぞれに自分自身を孤独だと思っていても、こういったところで同じように孤独を分け合えていることが凄く嬉しい
死にたいなんて思っても、本当に死ぬことのないように生きていてほしい。

I don't want to die, but I don't want to live like this

願點開這首歌的人都能被溫柔以待🥰

人の絶望感って比べられないよ。本人が辛いって思ったら辛いし、死にたいって思ったら死にたいよね。人生丁寧に生きてるからこそ感じるものが多いだけ❣️そんな丁寧な生き方してる人、友達になりませんか？☺️✨

I am literally in tears, this song already sounds sad enough, but when you read the lyrics, it's all the more heartbreaking. I have never heard a song that I could resonate with more.
This just gave a voice to all my unspoken fears and inner darkness.
The line, "the reason I wanted to die is because I was called a cold-hearted person." is what really gets to me.
But really, this song, as a whole would be what it sounds like if our hearts could put into words what burden it
And it is very real and powerful. Such tragedy portrayed in a song, that it is truly beautiful and mesmerising.