Hilariously Weird Training Videos

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I used to work at panera and everyone always talks about the “no onions” modification training video. It’s supposed to teach about the importance of getting everyone’s order 100% correct. They compare order accuracy to newborn babies getting mixed up at the hospital. It was something like “98% accuracy sounds great. BUt 2% WoULd bE a LoT oF bABieS sEnT tO tHE wRoNG fAmiLy!!!” and it goes on to show an example where a guy orders a sandwich with no onions and the line accidentally leaves them on. so the guy proceeds to be haunted by onions for the rest of the week and it starts raining onions and he falls to his knees dramatically and cries “I SAIID NOO ONIOONNNSSS”. Do with this information what you will.

Julie looks so broken inside when the lady says “personal pan pizza” after she says “what more could a customer want. Like, Julie are you ok. It’s just pizza

I worked at Toys R Us back in 2012 and we had to watch a VHS training video from the 90's. It wasn't particularly weird, but they hammered in the point of making sure you don't stop someone shoplifting, in case they have a weapon and could kill you. It must have been at least 3 minutes long, telling us to NOT go after them or even talk to them. Let them take the item and call the cops, or you could get hurt. Later on a month or two later I was blamed for letting someone take an item instead of trying to stop them and was written up.

Fun fact: rats are a lot like cats with their cleanliness and self grooming as well as hate of dirtiness. Which sounds strange given the rat’s image

If I can’t trust the sweaty man to tell me his honest opinion on lasagna, who can I trust?

Therapist: singing square patties aren't real. They can't hurt you. Singing square patties: 👄

The Walgreens anti-union video made it seem like unions were worse than shoplifters. Like union reps would loiter around the store like drug dealers peddling that higher wage, better benefits crap It was difficult not to laugh.

I worked at Chuck E Cheese in 2007-2009 and two things I wanted to bring up: that costume wasn't so much about worrying to pass out as it was not being able to scream for help when children attacked you. One of my coworkers was clobbered with a broom while just doing some rounds about the store. I got crowded by the stage picture machine and all the parents just laughed and continued filming their party. Secondly, the only thing I remember about the training video at the time is they used Beck's music. I don't remember what songs, but I distinctly remember this baffling me.

"one of the fun things people did in the 80s was, uh, cocaine" caught me so off guard

I love how the chef sounds like he’s going to cry at any moment

I was forced to watch a video where a man got onions on his sandwich after asking for no onions. He proceeded to be haunted by onions for weeks and this all culminated to him smelling onions in his bed, when he pulled the onion out of his pillowcase he screamed into the camera for an uncomfortable amount of time before the screen went black.

I worked at a SUPER COOL PLACE that had these ICONIC golden arches and after about a year of working the night shift there, I started to realize that my paychecks were inconsistent. Turns out my manager, Amanda(this is her real name because she's an awful person, a thief, and I don't work there anymore because of this so FU) stole money from me every single check. She would log into our system and clock us out for a while,just to make her numbers look good. I caught her in the middle of doing this and, suffice to say, I quit. I also told every other employee that I could before I left and,after checking their respective pay stubs and realizing the validity of my statements, several others also quit. Ha-ha, Amanda.

Danny and Kurtis: tiktok videos Drew: s h o p l i f t i n g in the 80s

"Is this a return or an exchange?" "Yes" as a retail worker I feel this in my veins

I worked briefly at Cinemark, and they had a "training" video that more just seemed like propaganda for the company. it was a walking-dead style skit thing where they were the "working dead" and all the employees were being turned into zombies. so the two last employees had to find a tape after cleaning up some trash. so it was like watching a tape within a tape, and they made fun of 80s slang. they said that the thing turning everyone into zombies is that "people weren't caring enough about their jobs" and that "it only takes one person to start the infection". the reason there was trash around was cause "only an employee who cared enough to clean would be able to find the tape and save the Cinemark" so anyway they brought everyone back with a disney-channel original level inspiring speech about how you should put all your effort into working there. i think what made that whole goofy training video better, is that immediately after they cut to this incredibly dry, serious slide show about fire safety and fire-related theatre disasters. i left after 2 weeks lol

You make the joke about if you need to pass out don’t do it in front of the kids, but that’s actually a serious rule in mascot jobs!!! I was a monkey at a soft play centre for years and even trained others to do it, we had a signal too. Once a girl almost passed out and we basically dragged / carried her back to our changing cupboard instead of taking the head off in the room with the kids hahah

Former Chuck E Cheese employee here: One thing they don’t prepare you for, when you put on the mascot suit for the first time, is your limited field of vision. I couldn’t see the 5-6 feet of the ground right in front of me unless I tilted my head down fairly significantly, due to the eye sockets of the mask being 6-7 inches away from my face. Once a small child sprinted up to me, surprising me so badly that I had no clue they were there. He kind of leapt at my legs and timed it poorly since I was in the middle of a silly dance move that required me to lift my leg up. Given that the mascot shoes are practically giant pillows, it trampolined the kid straight into the side of one of the arcade games and he flopped to the ground instantly. I stood there, frozen in panic, for I figured I just killed a kid. I quickly did a 360° and noticed nobody saw what just occurred, so I reached out to pat the kid on the shoulder. After 4-5 seconds, he eventually started making noise and opening his eyes. I was instantly on the other side of the building by the time he started crying. Never got in trouble for it and I still wonder if that little kid is alright. Pretty sure I obliterated his ability to do basic math... Also, I’ve played bar trivia with the guitarist for Bowling For Soup. So yeah...this video has really gone full circle for me lol

I’m a nurse and when I started my career we had to watch a training and information video about doing the laundry on a ward and changing beds. It explained that as a nurse you should be prepared for "unexpected surprises" in the bed...and showed a nurse removing the covers of a bed to discover a perfectly formed shit, then a wine bottle and even a needle. It then explained how to make a bed.

"I can't tell if this guy is ON cocaine" No, he IS cocaine